The Art of a Good Marriage

I came across this passage today from a bride on theknot.com who is planning on using it during her wedding ceremony and I really like it. I don't want to use it for our ceremony because we are going to be doing more of a traditional ceremony, with possibly one exception which I don't really plan on revealing till the Big Day. Any how, I thought this was nice and reflective. I wish that I could say Dave and I practice ALL of these things, but we still have much growing to do as a couple and will just keep working at getting better towards the goal of preparing for a strong marriage. One thing that I have learned about us is that sometimes it is okay to go to bed slightly mad. I tend to get over my angry feelings better after a good night's rest and I'm able to talk about what is making me mad once I become more rational. Well enjoy:

Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens.

A good marriage must be created.

In marriage the little things are the big things.

It is never being too old to hold hands.

It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry.

It is at no time taking the other for granted;

the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,

it should continue through the years.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.

It is standing together facing the world.

It is forming a circle of love that gathers the whole family.

It is doing things for each other,

not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.

It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.

It is not looking for perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience,understanding and a sense of humor.

It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow old.

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.

It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal,

dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.

It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.

- Wilferd Arlan Petersen

moving starts now.

today is the first day of a bunch of days that we will be moving! we get our keys today at 2pm and get to start paying rent and moving in :o). our lease does not end at our apartment till august 11 so we have an overlap of time that we can slowly begin setting up. however, i just found out that dave rented a uhaul over the weekend so it looks like we are going to try and get a majority of the work done this weekend! yaaaay. i am so ready to get out of this apartment, we just need more room and a yard. We have been living in 920 sq. ft. for the past 15 months and now we will have just over 1,300 square feet....woooohooo. 3 bedroom, 2 full baths, 2 car garage, fireplace (in central texas??? i know.) and a privay fenced in yard for Thor!!!! now we are only renting so i can't get too excited about decorating things and making it our own, but i am pretty excited about being able to do up our room and the guest room.

the best thing about getting out of our apartment ASAP is that we will have time to make the apartment like new again. it is going to take some SERIOUS work....in retrospect, we should have done some things differently in this apartment that primarily surround raising Thor. i use to hate locking him up for long days in the kennel so we would gate him in the kitchen...well he ate all of the molding there and has destoyed a cabinet door and our laundry room door, and our bathroom door (not in the kitchen area and a different incident.) we also have to repaint the accent wall in our living room that we painted sea green....and we need to fill a BUNCH of holes that Dave and JonO have drilled into the walls when setting up the surround sound. and then there is the carpet. which was brand new berber carpet, but not the high quality type that doesn't shed, and clogged up our vacuum after just 2-3 strokes everytime we vacuumed. it even continues to shed like that to this day, 15 months and tons of vacuuming later. so there are lots of little projects that we need to work on to hopefully not owe the apartment anymore money!

i also need to prepare the new house for is to move into it. the bathrooms and counters need to be cleaned and i want to vacuum everything before we start putting furniture down...so that is our plans for our busy weekend. yipeeee. i plan on taking pictures today before we start putting things in the house that i can hopefully upload here.

on a sad note, hardin has a growth on his foot that looks very much like a big blister...its disgusting and it's causing him to limp. a lot. i have an appointment scheduled for him at 2:20 today to hopefully get it taken care of...which reminds me i need to find his leash.

20 Things Every Girl Should Do Before Marry

My absolute favorite morning show ever is on vacation right now so they are just running "Best Of..." clips. Because of this I was forced to listen to Mix 94.7, The JB & Sandy Morning Show, which honestly isn't really that bad either. I mainly don't like them as much because 1) it is primarily ran by two guys so it has a more manly vibe, 2) they are generally more conservative and judgmental, 3) the two guys are a little bit older (not that i don't LOVE older guys, but their age annoyingly shows) and 4) i just really like (LOVE) the Bobby Bones Morning Show.

So anyways, I had to drive to Lockhart today for a work-related errand and was in the car to listen. They did a list over the air about things that a woman should do or accomplish before she gets married. I thought it was neat and I was later able to find it on one of hosts' blogs. So here is what that list had to say as well as some of my commentary as well (where appropriate because my mother reads this!) ;o).

1. Live by herself for at least a year.
Nope, and no thank you.

2. Live with someone else for at least a year.
I've had 3 roommates before D and I started shacking up.

3. Recover from a broken heart.
Check.

4. Have a vacation fling.
I kinda dated a boy I traveled to Mexico with, if that counts. I wasn't technically on vacation.

5. Take a road-trip with a group of girlfriends.
Check! South Padre '06 13 of us convoyed there andd stayed at a rental house.

6. Relish sleeping in a queen-sized bed by herself.
I've relished sleeping in a full-sized bed by myself.

7. Get her finances in order.
Working on it.

8. Learn to love her body.
Check. Luckily, I've never had major body issues. It has always been my wonderland (per John Mayer).

9. Have a relationship with at least one person she’d never want to marry (or introduce to mom).
Um...not really.

10. Find reliable birth control.
It has worked so far! (knock on wood.)

11. Pay off as much credit card debt and student loans as possible.
Monthly.

12. Spend way too much on a something frivolous.
Does a pet count? Lol. I have too much buyers remorse to splurge too much.

13. Exorcise all past relationship demons.
For the most part, yes.

14. Travel somewhere exotic.
Tampico & Hawaii, lots of non-exotic travels elsewhere too.

15. Establish a strong circle of friends.
Yes, I feel like I have a few forever-friends and then my family also.

16. Forgive her parents for not being perfect.
My parents weren't perfect?? I don't really have any mommy or daddy issues, so: check.

17. Have at least one night she can’t quite remember.
Check.

18. Experience some really bad first dates.
I never really dated like that. Relationships just tended to evolve.

19. Find hobbies that fulfill her.
Running, shopping, hiking, outdoors stuff.

20. Celebrate her 25th birthday.
That's stupid.

wedding on my brain

seems like everything i think about and focus on, and get distracted by pertains to the wedding. whew....i admire those who have long engagements, there is no way i could be this distracted for that long. 180 days more. that still feels like a long time, however we have a couple events coming up that will provide a little break from the wedding planning.

Saturday and Sunday coming up Dave and I are going to go to Oklahoma City and meet my parents there for a mini weekend getaway. we are planning on watching a USA Women's Softball Tourney and doing some sightseeing, possibly having dinner with some of Dave's college buddies and swimming. it's Monday and I'm already looking forward to the weekend. (story of my life).

this past weekend was very productive and exhausting as always. early Saturday morning Dave i loaded up Thor and headed to San Antonio. we had an appointment with our possible photographer at our wedding ceremony location and then we had an appointment at our reception site venue to show my mom and grandmother (and aunt and uncle and 4 cousins, and sister).

the thing about my family, which i would never trade for the world, is we have a habit of making most events a "Mexican field trip". my grandmothers house is usually bursting at the seams on the weekends and when going places almost always everyone tags along. it is so much fun! one of the great things about this weekend was we were able to show one of our ring bearers, Adan, and flower girl, Kelsi, where they would be walking in the church. i think it helped to easy a little of their anxiety about my wedding. that and i have had to bribe both Adan and Kelsi with 5 bucks :o). later after we dropped off the guys we went and did a little shopping for the flower girls dresses...and found them! perfect. check.

Saturday evening about 16 of us went for dinner at little red barn in San Antonio. we took both sets of grandparents and it was good to see everyone. Dave and i didn't plan to stay the night in San Antonio, but it got late after we got back from dinner. it was a better idea to get some sleep rather than face driving through Austin on a Saturday night.

Sunday once we got back to the apartment we were beat so we did some of our obligatory running around. dog food, groceries, best buy. and then went home to get some down time in before the week start. laundry, dishes and tidying up got done and then we were able to watch the 2ND disc of True Blood.

once Dave and I get back from Oklahoma city we must start packing and getting ready for the move into our new house. new to us, and not quite ours, but nonetheless exciting. the thing about the house that many people may not understand is the relief it will be for us as owners of a huge puppy dog. Thor requires a lot of work, a lot more work than i have ever had to do for the poodles that i have owned. i also think that i am very determined on raising him to the best of my ability because of his breed and for the reason that eventually Dave and i would like to introduce babies to our household. a rottweiler is such a wonderful animal, if raised responsibly. i am very lucky that Dave knows how to discipline him and train him, however, i am the one who tends to his exercising needs. once we have that fenced in yard in a couple of weeks my life will become 20times easier. i won't have to wake up at 5:30 am any more to take him for walks and runs. i can just throw him in the backyard! we also won't have to go to the dog park nearly as much because of the yard. i still would like to go to the dog park at least once a week to continue to socialize him.

Dave and i recently joined a recreational softball league and tonight is our first game! I'm beyond excited! i played rec league for 3 seasons while in college, but i did not play my senior year and did not play while i was in grad school. i looked around for leagues, but nothing would ever work with my schedule. we have just fallen into a routine because we are both done with school, and with our jobs and a friend asked us to join. it seemed perfect and tonight is the first game. our season is 10 weeks long and we play 8 games during this time, every Monday. i think i may be playing second base which should be fun! i am usually on the left side of the field somewhere, however i get hesitant to play there when playing coed. (this fear originates from getting popped in the collarbone by Ryan when i was pitching to him in high school). i think our team's name is Austin Heat....wish us luck!

12:34.56 7/8/9....10!!!

So...I got a cool idea from Jason Mraz's blog (click here). Today is July 8, 2009...also 7-8-9. So some MATH dork realized that today at 12:34 pm and 56 seconds that the time and date together would be 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9...actually very very very cool. Right? Well, on his blog he was inspired to jot down 10 things "grateful for today, for summer, for love, and for reasons that don’t need explaining." He also inspired me to do the same.

1. coffee and hazelnut flavored splenda

2. carpooling with my fiance every morning and evening even though we usually want to kill each other over the radio and each other's driving

3. the bobbybones show and their podcast (click here to check 'em out)

4. lunch date with Sam. i just found out that she is temping not even 1 mile away from my office! we had our first lunch date, and she ends that position in three weeks. must squeeze more in.

5. Jimmy John's Salt and Vinegar chips.

6. gas going down a little bit

7. Pandora (dot) com...best streaming radio station without commercials. can be tailored to meet your listening needs (click it)

8. my mom and sister texting me throughout the day

9. being healthy

and

10. being greeted by Thor & Hardin at home at the end of the day. their unconditional love usually makes them forget&forgive being locked up for 10 hours m-f.

Summertime Thor

This is what Thor looks like in the summer, or anytime it is hotter than 85 degrees or so:

Today was 103 degrees. GOD Bless Texas :o)....

I feel like a YEEEHAW would sound right after a sentence like that.

Fools Rush In

Dave and I are not fools, nor are we rushing in into anything...However, if you have ever seen that movie sometimes that is how I feel as Dave and I begin the real process of merging our lives together. Although this process started about two years ago it has made itself more apparent in the past couple of months as we have planned our wedding. We come from different cultural backgrounds and it's so much fun learning how Dave's family does stuff differently than mine, and deciding between the two of us how we want our household to do things. It's neat that his background and my background are coming together to pretty much make up us and how our family will eventually be. Hopefully we can take the best from each side and make it even better :o). This may hold true for any couple that gets married, but I think because of our cultural differences our families are very different, and in a good way. I also never realized how Mexican my family secretly is until I started planning our wedding....I mean, c'mon...Mariachis will be there....Ole!

So watch Fools Rush In, if you haven't already and if you have already, watch it again. Even before Dave it has always been one of my favorite movies of all time. Dave and I actually like to quote a particular part of the movie that really makes me laugh all of the time! It's the part of the movie where Alex Whitman and Isabel Fuentes parent's are meeting for the first time on a boat in Nevada and Alex's dad and mom can't take the heat and he says something like, "how do you people stand this heat...the white people are melting out here! "

So yes, just a little random weekday blog...I'm really looking forward to the 4th of July weekend (even though I do not get a single day off this week). We are going up my parent's house and lots of family will be there from San Antonio, as well as the Copelands and possibly even an Aunt and Uncle and family from Germany.

Last 4th of July I went up to Harker Heights to barbeque with my family while Dave was working all day. I left HH as soon as Dave got off so that we could spend the evening together, and we just ended up going to see a movie and i did not get to see any fireworks. However, since D has the weekends off this year we will be able to stay and watch fireworks! the only problem is, they may possibly be banned because everywhere in central texas is experiencing a serious drought! We will see.

*Wedding Planning update....We finally landed a wedding reception venue!!!! ahhhhhh (that was a sigh of serious relief). Last weekend Dave, Annette, Reese and I went to San Antonio with the main mission of trying out and looking at a couple of the rehearsal dinner locations that Annette was looking at. We also planned to do a couple of venue visits while in San Antonio. Luckily, a couple turned into only one, and we decided on the Republic Golf Club. I loved it and it has a great texas style to it and very nice at the same time. Also, it is in the same area as the Mission San Jose, only about 6 miles away! The only thing that we are trying to work on is the time gap between the wedding and the reception. The ceremony is going to be a 1p.m. and we can't decide what time to hold the reception. Ideally, I would like it to be at 5-10 so that people can be ready for dinner and party on a Saturday night, but it feels like from 2 until 5 would be too much time for there to be nothing going on (except taking pictures/getting pictures done). Oh well. Slowly it's all coming together.

A portion of the Republic Golf Club - I'm getting really excited about decorating!!!
Here is the link to our wedding website just incase: http://www.mywedding.com/amandandaveswedding/